Day 38 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 38

Today I was surprised to wake up and think, “ooo, what can I do tomorrow?” This could only be the procrastinator in me who is just afraid to start filming myself, or, the fact that I stayed up til 5:30am watching videos from two of my new favorite heroes, Casey Neistat and Peter McKinnon. If you’re paying attention to the YouTube nation, you have likely already heard of these two but I was blessed to find them while researching the Patreon videos of those who have successfully utilized the platform. I realized that I’ve been doing the world a disservice by NOT filming my adventures. I make it a point to do the most interesting stuff possible and always have more fun if I’m making something too. Great examples… the day I went to North Bend/Snoqualmie to film a Twin Peaks tribute with @TheRingOfDOOM and going on rap tours. Since I grew up in this area and we were always into free entertainment, I visited Snoqualmie Falls and the surrounding areas more times than I can count but the process of making the video made it a whole new experience.  

One of the best things I learned from two of my new favorite YouTubers is the beauty of B-Roll footage. Without really knowing what it means, I’ve acquired quite a bit of amazing B-Roll because I like filming weird stuff. Watching Casey’s videos in particular, helped me to realize that there is much to be gained by being brave enough to just film it all and that wearing sunglasses is more than okay. The life I will be living on this Europe trip will be both inspiring, beautiful, hilarious, and will show the world places they don’t often see. By showing them what I’m seeing and allowing them into my weird world, I may get closer to being able to afford food on the trip… so I must. Visiting Porto showed me the joys and financial benefits of exploring the smaller cities in a country so while I will be heading to London and Paris, I plan to spend most of my time in the cities that have gotten less press over the years. It may be the galleries and artists from the city that somehow found my Instagram but I’m feeling the call to Rotterdam and I can’t wait to figure out why. Other cities I have on my list are Bristol, Manchester, Liverpool, Edinburgh, Belfast, Stavanger, Copenhagen, Oslo, Madrid, Marseilles, Bordeaux, Florence, Naples, and everywhere else really. I couldn’t be more confident that my adventures will be weirder, and therefore way more interesting, than those who have gone before me only IF I’m brave enough to be myself in front of the camera. A 40 year old woman traveling with an MF DOOM based fictional character will probably make a very different video than a twenty-something influencer-type who wants to hit the clubs. Until I’m able to firmly grasp the assistance of a team, I get to explore myself as a filmmaker and continue to make the weirdest stuff possible on my own terms.

In the past, my creativity ran out almost exactly the moment I realized I’d be out of money in a few days and my @TheRingOfDOOM US TOUR stopped dead in its tracks approximately twelve hours into Texas as I was heading further south into areas where sleeping in my car at night would be way too sweaty to become a reality. Looking back on the still unused footage I’m realizing that the missing link is the B-Roll footage. I was so caught up on getting shots with @TheRingOfDOOM in it that I neglected to capture the scenery for the most part. Had I been vlogging at the time, my story would be so much different and it likely would have helped me stay on top of the depression that held me back at the time. Watching the sizzle reels of the videographers I worked with at Bumbershoot and the videos of Casey Neistat and Rob McKinnon showed me how far I have to go on this journey but as long as I can stay on top of my mindstate, I’m going to have a blast learning how to make better videos and my progression will be wicked awesome.

Last night at approximately 4:30am was when I decided I must go to the woods today for further reflection and to see what kind of footage I’m called to create today. After I finish this post and promote it, I’m heading to the woods for the first time in way too long to gather both my thoughts and also footage to set the scene of Washington as a whole for my Patreon video. It is not a new concept that the pursuit of money can halt artists in their tracks and that struggle mode prevents artists from maximizing their potential on a daily basis. I began to seek out financial stability outside of the music industry so I can afford to keep working with musicians and have every intention of using the platform I create to highlight the artists that inspire me. For the most part, the money issue has been why I’m a Delusional Optimist and not just an Optimist. I wholeheartedly believe that the universe will provide me with everything I need once I figure out what that is and to this day it has proven to be true. While there are many things at this time that would make my life easier and/or healthier; I have more than what I need to survive and am in a better position than most of the people on this planet in spite of my lack of health insurance, a stable income, food money, and a permanent home. We get to prioritize whatever we want in our lives and by choosing travel as my main priority, I’ve abandoned what normal people feel they need to survive in search of adventure and this is why I must show people my story and bring them along with me. The only way I will make this work is by allowing myself the headspace to develop this idea to its fullest.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk In The Woods and get some great footage

4.     Blog Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) - LISBON

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.      Further work on Lisbon post.

7.    Further work on freeing up space on my laptop and phone for new adventures. (I’ve spent many hours of the last few days on this boring but vital task).

8.   Make plan for exit of studio space and of the final footage I’ll get in the space for my Patreon video.

SONG OF THE DAY

Chris Whitley – “Big Sky Country” 1991  This song has remained a constant in my life since listening to the song on cassette in the family Suburban on road trips through big sky country in the early nineties. I know from experience how many places in the middle of the US that are the perfect spot to play this song and am headed there today.

Day 37 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 37

Today I woke up and made my plan for the day before I looked at my phone like all the best people recommend. I already went to my studio, the post office, and I’ve eaten breakfast like a boss. These days, the only urgent business I typically have is to make a few bucks on eBay but I know that is temporary. There was a time in my music career in which I could fill an eight-hour workday answering emails and promoting music and events that wouldn’t earn me any money so this is great progress actually. As the day for my departure creeps closer (11 DAYS!), I’m realizing that I’ll need to narrow my focus and prioritize what really needs to happen before I leave. Even if I do all the small stuff to make money before I go like sell my unneeded belongings and work hourly jobs, it still wouldn’t be enough to fund my Europe trip so for the most part it seems like a waste. I must figure out how to earn money while I’m traveling to make this adventure work. Thus lies the I’mPossible. I’ve already let the catering company know that I’ll no longer be working for them because while the money does add up, it’s only enough to keep me squatting in Seattle and the mindstate of those who work there poisons my soul. There are many examples of people who have made a living while traveling and I WILL be one of those people.

@TheRingOfDOOM at the site of the Banksy/Robbo feud in Camden, London in January 2017.

Signs that I am on the right path are coming from all directions. I still am reveling in my good fortune about the random opportunity to work alongside some of the most successful videographers and producers in the world in the weeks before I head off to make my own video series on my iPhone. It was a déjà vu from when I was blessed to work on Tom Petty’s documentary team last summer about a week before I left to drive solo across the country to make tour documentaries about @TheRingOfDOOM. The most encouraging out of all the messages heading my way from the universe are the people whose attention I’ve been able to capture in the last few months. I am the first to admit that overanalyzing Instagram likes could be a pretty silly hobby but when the Creative Director for VICE shows up in your notifications (as he did yesterday), you know you’re getting somewhere. Beyond that, I still smile in wonder when I remember that the Security Guard at Beyond The Streets in LA already knew my travel itinerary before I even said a word to her. The seeds I have been planting on a global scale are 100% intentional and it is working. By photographing @TheRingOfDOOM alongside some of the most famous and talented Street Art AND inside some of the most prestigious museums and galleries in the world, I have placed myself on the radar of all these people and it feels like they’re all waiting to see what I do next. I plan to go to all the galleries in France and the UK that follow me to ensure they’ll keep watching and it is only a matter of time before it all comes together. Rewatching Jack Conte (CEO of Patreon etc.) share his advice about sticking with it has become a daily ritual and I couldn’t be more confident that this trip will change the lives of everyone I know. If I’ve ever shown an interest in your art, know that I’m knowing this to create opportunities for you.

A little pick-me-up from @JackConte 🌟🌟🌟. The full episode is gold. https://t.co/ClJch8aa86 pic.twitter.com/vZo7dA1q9X

— Chase Jarvis (@chasejarvis) September 3, 2018

I’ve always known that when I narrow my focus and work directly towards one goal, I’ll make it happen faster than anyone thought possible. As of today, I will make the creation of @TheRingOfDOOM series and all it’s promotion my number one goal and create my own visual art as my after hours hobby if I have time for it. I love making collages and I can’t wait to make art with found items all over Europe but the long term reality of me going all in on being a visual artist is spending thousands of hours alone gluing tiny pieces of paper. By going all in for my fictional character who is intent on saving Earth by way of inspiring its artist community, I’ll be out in the world on a daily basis and also potentially change millions of lives for the better. Knowing that I am so close to making this happen that the Creative Director from VICE would show even the tiniest bit of interest in my work helped me sharpen my focus and put this all into perspective. To be clear, I’m flying to London for a two month trip in 11 days and at this moment, I’ll run out of money by the end of the month. I believe so strongly that it will all work out that I’m going anyway and will have no place of my own to come back to (unless you count my car).

People that take risks like I am about to take are the ones that win. One of the best parts about this is that my idea is truly unique and no one has attempted it… at least I believe it is. That said, if you know someone else who is trying to start a Street Art/History Joke travel show hosted by an alien fictional character made of clay who wears an MF DOOM ring as a mask and is intent on saving the world via art, please send them my way. They’re likely my soul mate. It has taken me forty years to focus in on the thing I believe will help me make my best mark on the world and I couldn’t be happier to realize that I’m already this far along my path. As I write this, the hairs on my arms started reaching for the ceiling. This is it. I finally found my thing and it is as weird and awesome as I am… now I just need to focus my energies on communicating my idea with the masses.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     2 Blog Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) - LISBON

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.      Finish collaging purple coaster set.

7.       Study 4Culture site and other grant options

8.      Watch too many Patreon videos so I can learn how to make mine better

9.      Work on Lisbon post.

10.    Go to Art Walk and talk to at least two people.

SONG OF THE DAY

Madvillain – “Accordion” 2004   It is time for me to reach out to DOOM’s team again to check in about continuing to use his likeness. If he’d like me to stop, @TheRingOfDOOM may transform into something else once he drinks the water in Bristol. If DOOM and his team want to be part of the story, we all win.

Day 36 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 36

Yesterday was my first day of housesitting and I was not even close to being as productive as I hoped I would be less than two weeks away from departure for Europe. When I wake up in my tiny studio, there are limited options for what to do with myself so working hard to escape the box is always the obvious option. Now I sit here typing at a table that would take up half my studio, thinking about making hash browns from scratch because I can. Normally I would just eat almonds, toast, or something else super fast. That said, being around all this free food since the beginning of Bumbershoot weekend has shown me how hungry I’ve been over the last month or so. Eating the bare minimum to stay functional so you don’t have to pay for more food is not that tight; food is so good (understatement of the forever). Even though I’ve been broke for years, I’ve never applied for food stamps because I feel so lucky to live the life that I do. I usually make too much money to qualify for assistance on paper but because my bills are so high, the food money is not there and/or I’ve just been prioritizing good credit instead.

Basically, the summary of yesterday was that I ate all the delicious leftovers in the place and now I want to spend all day cooking because I haven’t been able to for so long. It has been over a year and a half since I had daily access to a real kitchen so it is not surprising that all I want to do today is eat. As I write this I hear GaryVee telling us all that sometimes we have to eat shit for a few years so we can eat caviar for the rest of our lives. Don’t get it twisted, I’m not into caviar so for me it’s more like… eat shit for a few years so I can eat enchiladas, vermicelli bowls, and sushi for the rest of my life but the same principle applies. [2 paragraphs in, I’m realizing I should have eaten breakfast before writing this, LOL]

My favorite thing that I did do yesterday was put together my photo portfolio. The bright blue photo album from the 70s is one of the best things I found during my short stint as someone who dug through the by-the-pound bins at the Goodwill Outlet; so good I couldn’t sell it. I have yet to print a few of my best photos but overall, every page in the portfolio is whoa and I cannot wait to see my photos in an oversized coffee table book or framed on a wall… here’s hoping someone else will feel the same way.

Today I will tackle laundry, watching Patreon videos, finish the first layers on my purple coaster set, study 4Culture website, and work on writing my Lisbon travel blog. I’ll also eat tons of delicious food courtesy of my generous sister and brother-in-law; love you guys. Some of it I will do while watching the giant television but I will be more productive if I listen to music instead… as always.

Not everyone can relate to my tunnel vision for my goal and the things I’ve abandoned to make it happen. Ultimately, we have no need for most of the luxuries we currently feel are necessary for life and I have chosen differently than most. Of course it would be nice to have a big fully stocked house but as a single person, I don’t need that much space or that much of a financial burden. As a happily divorced person, I know that same house and the jobs one must work to keep them can feel like a cage if not cohabitating with the right person. Life really is a Choose Your Own Adventure book and mine reads differently than most, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     2 Blog Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) - LISBON

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.      Finish collaging purple coaster set.

7.       Study 4Culture site and other grant options

8.      Watch too many Patreon videos so I can learn how to make mine better

9.      Do laundry in this house and not in a Laundromat, wooooo!

10.    Work on Lisbon post.

SONG OF THE DAY

Frank Ocean – “Nikes” 2016  I don’t believe I have ever owned Nikes (I know it’s weird but so am I) but now I would buy all Nike everything if I could. Football means nothing to me but Colin Kaepernick is still one of my heroes and I could not support his actions more. In addition to being the best branding move I’ve seen in a minute, the actual photographs of Mr. Kaepernick and Serena Williams used for the ads are beautiful. Shoutout to Nike, Serena, and Colin for inspiring all the best people and reinforcing our crazy dreams to make the world a better place. You amaze me, thank you.

Day 35 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 35

Today is the first day of housesitting at my sister’s place so my daily routine will be challenged by a new location. I’ve already benefitted from the joys of having a kitchen and this is looking to be a truly delicious five days. I’m able to breathe financially for a few days thanks to my sister and brother-in-law being so classy and paying me to stay here and watch the house. Still in awe of my Bumbershoot experience and hoping I’ll get to work with that team again soon.

The post office wasn’t open for Labor Day yesterday so I’ll be mailing off the eight eBay orders today. Still have a bunch of items on there but it’s remains to be small change. My DVD bundles sold pretty well but I have so many more CDs that I’m pretty sure taking them to a store to see if they want them is the best bet. The biggest challenge of housesitting will be to remain productive when not surrounded by my art supplies. I have infinite laptop/phone projects that I love working on while I’m traveling but I have less than two weeks to work on physical art AND of course making some actual money, so I must use the time wisely. I got a bunch of my favorite photos printed out through an app called FreePrints and I have a retro style photo album to compile into a portfolio of some of my best shots. It’s been years since I’ve seen my photos printed so it’s pretty rad. I can already see that there is a limit to how large the prints can be when using an iPhone but one step at a time. Upgrading to a new camera is one of my Patreon goals but since I don’t have any patrons yet, I’m pretty far from that one. There is still so much to learn about the art of making a photograph so it is not a priority for me at this time; I love having a camera that fits in my pocket that also plays music. I’m not really pushing the Patreon yet because I wanted to make a better video for it first on a day when I’m fully rested but since I got up at 6:30am to take my fam to the airport, today may not be the day.

I’ve been waiting to walk into the 4Culture office until I had both my photo portfolio completed and cleaned up the edges of more of my art… it is almost time. I want to ask them which of my creative endeavors would be best suited for a grant. It is possible that I have too many creative hobbies but is that really a thing? The edge cleanup of my collages is proving to cause me more physical pain than I thought. Grinding down the sharp edges with a file takes forever and the resulting epoxy resin dust is most definitely not good to breathe in so I’ve been using pliers to break off chunks or whacking it super hard with the file instead. This has led to bleeding on multiple occasions so I’m feeling more inclined to make new art instead of cleaning up the old art OR wait to clean it up until I can use someone’s belt sander. That said, my first big 3D water collage with @TheRingOfDOOM in it is already sanded and ready to go. Pricing one’s own art is already hard enough but when I need money it gets trickier because I don’t want to sell myself short. I shouldn’t expect much because I haven’t sold any art yet but I WILL SOON!

I decided I’ll bring some collage projects over here to work on; currently working on a set of six purple wavy coasters that I pretaped so if I pour too much resin, there will be nothing to sand… love this revelation. I do have 3-4 smaller wood blocks I can tape off and make into art as well but I love making big pieces. It would be wise for me to use the rest of my resin before I leave so it doesn’t go bad. I’ll likely end up making more of my freestanding @TheRingOfDOOM lights made purely with resin and el wire with a battery pack. I haven’t photographed the one I finished outside at night yet but I know it’ll be hilarious to make the photo.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     2 Blog Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) - LISBON

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Mail eBay items

7.     Make photo portfolio

8.     Finish purple coaster set so it’ll be ready for resin tomorrow.

9.     Study 4Culture site again so I know what questions to ask.

10.    Reunite all of my clothing, wash it, figure out what I want to bring to Europe or storage

11.    Watch a bunch of successful Patreon announcement videos so mine will be even better

SONG OF THE DAY

Mali Music – “Gonna Be Alright” 2017   I love this song so much but I can never seem to mention it without also bringing up the Damon Albarn side project from 2002. Mali Music is actually from Mali though so I should quit that… next time of course.

Day 34 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 34

Last night when I got home from working the last day of Bumbershoot at 3am I drafted what would be today’s blog if it wasn’t so viciously honest. Instead I will summarize the 760 word passion filled rant by saying that the people in my work history who know they’re not following Spiderman’s uncle’s advice are visibly shook when they see me. The ones who are genuinely good people who just happen to work for the corporation had nice things to say and I think they're awesome. My greatest discovery since I double backflipped off the corporate ladder into credit card poverty is that when you work for well-intended leaders who are truly good at what they do, they’ll literally starve if you don’t have what you need to do your job well…  in addition to paying a livable wage and providing you with ample tools to reach your infinite potential.

SZA's image in the fountain at Seattle Center.

Thankfully, the fact that I was working at the festival helped me to rise above my social anxiety and meet some people I’ve been too intimidated by to speak to. I got to spend time with an artist I’ve been inspired by yesterday because I simply said hi and told him how much I admired his work. The half an hour or so we spent walking around the festival woke me the fuck up and I realized that I’ve been neglecting my superpowers. As always seems to be the case, the universe brings people into my life when I need them the most… and I needed to speak with a lot of people to feel the way I do today. Spending so much time in solitude over the last year and a half was exactly what I needed at the time but some of the people I met this weekend reminded me that I have already proven my ability to change people’s lives for the better in a 10 minute conversation or less because I see only their infinite potential. This is why I must wield my superpower on a global level and pursue this trip to Europe as if it is my only option for survival.

Terrible image of the amazing SZA onstage at Bumbershoot. 

On that note, I have seven sold eBay items to ship out today if the post office is actually open for the holiday (Google isn’t sure). I am releasing sixteen of my favorite DVDs so that I can ensure my own life will be movie-worthy. Unfortunately, most of the items I own are only important to me and don’t have much value in a seller’s market so the money I’m earning is not adding up to much. I now have TWO WEEKS until I leave for Europe and still lack the fundage to even pay for my monthly bills because I’m so optimistic that this will work out, I’ve mostly abandoned hourly wages. I have accepted four shifts for a catering company next week purely for the money; it will add up to very little but every dollar counts (as I write this I’m remembering that if I think hourly, I’ll get hourly; if I think large chunk of money, I’ll get a large chunk of money… shit, LOL).

Sadly, @TheRingOfDOOM has not been photographed in more than a week and The Vulcan Of Amazonia project has been procrastinated for over a month. I do have some footage of he and Eddie’s cardboard box apartment under Bezos’ Balls but I realized that I’ve likely been neglecting it because my whole schtick is to shine light on the good things. It could not be more important to raise awareness about the damage Amazon and Vulcan have done to the city but it hurts my heart to spend my time seeking out and highlighting the effects of villainous capitalists; they get enough press (because they own it). I have more than a few photos to make of the best parts of Seattle before I leave and it is a beautiful day outside (and inside).

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Blog Post On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also)

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.    Prep and attempt to mail eBay items.

7.    Brainstorm new Patreon video

8.    Take at least one photo of @TheRingOfDOOM with some Seattle Street Art

9.    Collage clean up session

SONG OF THE DAY

Tom Petty – “You Got Lucky” 1982   Following the trail of the happiest people in the music industry has repeatedly united me with the video team. My last day as a Runner when I met the blissed out traveling videographer of a famous rapper, my shifts with the documentary team at the Tom Petty show last summer, and working with the LiveXLive team this weekend has been a triple message from the universe that I have loved the combination of music and video since I first as exposed to MTV (in it’s actual music video era) as a child. This Tom Petty music video was the impetus of my long-running themed music video list addiction. While watching these visuals, I realized how many music videos I’d seen that take place in the desert; this led to hundreds of music video lists on my old Blogger site grouped together by random thing instead of genre. The thousands of videos I posted on my website were my foot in the door of the music industry that got lucky when I found it. My goal continues to be to create a path around the mainstream corporate vultures for truly talented, socially aware artists that make music I love listening to. Upon further reflection, I’ll say that it is the musicians/artists that got lucky when I found them; the music industry’s luck is running out.

Day 33 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 33

Yesterday’s “work” shift for the video team filming Bumbershoot was another truly wonderful day. Once again, the people I reconnected with brought joy to my caffeinated heart and learning from professional ass kickers is always wicked awesome. I maintain my stance that I have one of the best jobs at Bumbershoot and couldn’t be more excited for what today will bring. I completed one 90-minute work block of daily blog/Instagram before work and was able to show some rad people how great of a worker I am.

J. Cole sharing his soul on stage at Bumbershoot.

This morning, I officially let the keepers of my art studio know that I’ll be moving out before I leave for Europe. Feels weird to know that I won’t officially have my own place to go when I get back in two months but my world will then be too large to confine myself in a 10x10 cube anyway. I’ve had zero contact from Carter Subaru in Ballard where I bought my car after reaching out to them and I’m more than disappointed that they did not respond at all. When you spend $36,000 somewhere, returning your email is kind of expected. I still love that damn car even though I’ve never been in a position to own it but whatever happens with it I’ll never spend another dollar at their dealership again. Still maintain that if I could somehow monetize that Ariana Grande has been in my car, all my financial troubles would be over. Mostly, yet not really kidding.

King Of Ballard AKA Grynch On The Mural Stage

In the month of September, I completed 158 ninety-minute work blocks. This works out to be 237 hours and/or 7.6 hours per day (no weekends when you must create a career for yourself). The progress I made on my art in this time amazes me and I can’t wait to see how it evolves over the next few years. I spent the least amount of time on things I was doing just for the money; in hindsight it was foolish but I maintain that playing it safe is a terrible idea (as I write this I can almost hear The Don Gary Vaynerchuk telling me to be practical). One of the epic waste of time surveys I did on Swagbucks recently that earned me a whopping one penny asked if I had gambled in the last 30 days. I answered no but really I’m gambling on myself every day because I know the odds are stellar.

I’ll be housesitting a bit over the next two weeks so my routine will be different but it will be nice to have a whole kitchen for a while. I plan on using the time to strategically repack my storage unit with only the things I love enough to keep in boxes for years (such a ridiculous statement), releasing the rest via sales/donations, and seeking out ways to fund my trip. The reaction I get when I tell people about my storyboarded @TheRingOfDOOM miniseries that starts with him drinking the water in Bristol reinforces that I’m attempting something truly unique that can bring joy to so many people’s lives. I couldn’t be more confident that I am the ONLY person trying to do this exact thing so technically I have a monopoly on all things @TheRingOfDOOM related but it’s 100% on me to learn to communicate my ideas so others can get a clear view of what I plan to accomplish. Communication has never been one of my strengths but as with everything, one gets better with practice.

Stoked for these guys that they got to go to perform at Red Rocks as their trio with Grieves, Greater Than, a couple days ago with Atmosphere and Evidence. These are some great humans.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Blog Post On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also)

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.    Remember to eat.

SONG OF THE DAY

Rhye – “Open” 2013   Still having a moment with all things Rhye. I first posted this song back in March 2013 in a compilation of Music Videos Featuring Confetti and it has maintained currently overplaying status to this day.

Day 32 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 32

Until last night, I had forgotten the feeling one gets when they watch one of their favorite artists purely as a fan. The last five years of working with musicians has been a beautiful experience that I plan to continue but the heartbreak of working for those who cannibalize music, musicians, music fans, and their own employees left a mark on my soul that won’t go away. Watching Rhye’s performance at Bumbershoot yesterday reminded me why I dove headfirst into the industry and why it’s important that I stay on my wonky path. Even though I was technically working the festival, for most of Rhye’s set I was able to stand in the fan area and get all swoony about a band I truly love. Mike Milosh has chosen his team well and I could not have been more impressed by the man himself. Here’s hoping I’ll get to tour with them someday soon. Since someone on the Rhye team liked my Adult Contemporary playlist promo image on Instagram a few days ago, we’re practically already best friends (LOL). That said, if you’re reading this Mr. Milosh, I’m actually very qualified to go on tour with you and I will no bullshit be one of the best tourmates you’ve ever had... or we could just date instead if you prefer.

Rhye onstage at Mural Amphitheater at Bumbershoot.

One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned throughout my entire life is the importance of knowing when to say no. Had I said yes to the first opportunity to work Bumbershoot, I would have worked at least a 16 hour day if not more and been a stressball. Oddly enough, I do strangely enjoy those long days but because I was patient and because I’ve kicked so much ass in the past, I ended up with less than twelve hour shifts in which my main task is to go to the photo pit in front of the stage and hand fans hats, shirts, and bags. Fortunately, this only takes a few minutes because fans want everything that is coming from the stage area, I am free to take photos right next to the damn stage, catch up with friends I haven’t seen in awhile, and watch Rhye.

A clown doing his thing on stage. Not a fan but it would be stupid not to photograph the dude.

Other than meeting and working with a team that travels worldwide to video events, making actual money, and reconnecting with some of my favorite people in the world, I did not do anything I could count as a work block. Since I didn’t post anything on Instagram yesterday, my first work block wasn’t a full 90 minutes. I did not bring @TheRingOfDOOM with me yesterday but he was with me in patch form on my sweatshirt. Even though I’m pretty sure no one cares and some of my most popular @TheRingOfDOOM posts have been created while flexing the power of my credentials working music events, it seems tacky to photograph my fictional character while working. It is exactly this morality that keeps getting in my way but I’ll keep running with it. I haven’t even posted some of my most epic @TheRingOfDOOM moments because I worked too closely with the artist and their team to post a photo taken of them without asking their permission specifically. I have at least fifteen minutes of footage of @TheRingOfDOOM sidestage with Kaytranada and a few photos of him sidestage with Tyler, The Creator. Kaytranada once held @TheRingOfDOOM in his hand in the front seat of my car and told me that Madlib gave him the DOOM ring right off his finger (one of my favorite memories ever). I would only want to post a photo of @TheRingOfDOOM and Tyler if he was seriously fucking with the idea; oddly enough I do believe he’d think it was dope because he’s also a DOOM fan. These are the experiences that prevent me from settling on a job purely for the money. That said, I did let the catering company I sometimes work for that I’m available to work for the next two weeks so I can be guaranteed some fundage for my trip.

Ludacris doing his thing onstage at Bumbershoot.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Blog Post On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also)

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.    Remember to eat.

SONG OF THE DAY

Rhye – “The Fall” 2012  Like most of us, I incorrectly assumed that the older woman in this video was the singer of Rhye but seeing the magical intro of this song coming out of Mike Milosh’s mouth woke me the fuck up and instantly made me a superfan as written above. This song will likely always make my heart feel funny and I love that.

Day 31 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 31

At 31 days into writing about how I hope to go to Europe and never work for corporations again, I find myself getting ready to go work at an evil corporation’s music festival. On the scale of immoral ways to earn money, working for a corporation is really not so bad (in the eyes of most of the world) and like I said yesterday, I’m actually working for a company contracted by AEG so I can justify it in my brain. That said, I’m gonna have so much fun and have 1000 reasons to smile just on this first day alone. It’ll be a great weekend; very much looking forward to meeting and working with this New York-based video team; the man in charge has worked with Nabil and Hype Williams (wicked awesome).

Yesterday my push to relieve myself of stuff in my storage unit turned into a whopping $10.60 via selling three CDs and one dress. They recommended I head to a different music store because they just bought 800 earlier in the day, that sounds like a task for Monday. I did sell another CD today for $2 on eBay, a still in plastic Luniz CD so I’m that much closer; LOL. While I was out, I brought my large collages into a small art gallery/shop in Ballard and asked them what they thought of my art. He gave me some great advice and told me he thought it was cool; so now I must continue to figure out how to translate that into $$$.

The absolute best thing I did yesterday was actually set up my Patreon. It’s live and ready to go as I write this. I’ll still be making a Patreon specific video but for now I used the Lisbon travel video I finished a few days ago because there’s actually footage of me speaking to the camera. I’m excited to see how this develops and I hope others like the idea of an original collaged postcard every month. I would absolutely love to receive one so it seems like the perfect choice. It’s kind of crazy how confident I am that @TheRingOfDOOM can bring so much joy to people’s lives, must stick with it! All the best people will tell you never to give up on your dreams, it is only those who’ve allowed themselves to be sucked into the system completely that will tell you to take the safe route.

It’s hard to know if I should make a plan for myself if I don’t happen to raise enough money for this trip. I’ve already ditched Plans B-Z, I have a plane ticket, and I can see myself filming @TheRingOfDOOM at Portishead Bay; there is no turning back. Even when I don’t have any, money feels like it’ll be there when I need it most (almost laughable with a mouthful of cavities but I’ve made my choices and I’m okay with them). All of my brainpower should be focused on what I want to do, NOT what I’ll do if Plan A doesn’t work out. At this point, the only way I wouldn’t go is if the government stopped me from getting on the plane for some illegitimate reason. The amount of money I need to make this two month trip happen is minimal because I plan on staying in hostels or cheap Air BNB’s; approximately $5000 would keep my bills paid, have a roof over my head, and eat minimal food. This is approximately the cost of living in Seattle for two months (if I paid Bezosian-warfare rent) and extremely small change for investor types. Since my entertainment is literally walking around the city taking photos, my costs are low. I could not be more excited for this adventure and can’t wait to make art in Bristol.

I’ve linked my Patreon again here and I’d really love to make and send you a postcard from Europe. Thanks for reading, I love you.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Survive The Festival via remembering to eat.

4.     One Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also)

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

SONG OF THE DAY

Evidence – “Throw It All Away” 2017   Evidence totally gets it. Here’s hoping we cross paths in Europe as we’ll be there at the same time.

Day 30 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 30

The days that I go to my storage unit usually feel like a big waste of time. It can be tricky to get down to business and just put stuff on eBay when you’ve just been reunited with your long lost CD collection or music machine you thought was broken. The question that keeps making me actually list the items is, “if I end up finding a way to stay in Europe for a year or so via Patreon (or however it works out), will I be glad I’ve got this CD in a box across the world?” Or ”in what situation would I actually ever use this”  (works great for old CDs). Some of the CDs I actually kept because (the opposite of delusional optimism) after the apocalypse, streaming music services may be dead but we can rig up bicycles or rivers to make energy to power CD players. I actually pictured myself smiling next to a fire listening to a Jenny Lewis CD in a post-apocalyptic setting yesterday, so I’m keeping that one (among many others).

Taking these Pez dispensers and paper cutout Of Gandalf to Europe to use as props in @TheRingOfDOOM’s movie about returning the ring to MF DOOM cuz if I don't do it, no one else will.

 Yesterday I mailed my first order of this round to someone I realized I already knew. I love that it’s not surprising to me that I would know someone who would buy 90s rap cassettes on the internet. I seem to have used up my free auction listings so I started listing CDs at a Buy It Now price to see if they moved faster. I sold Kanye’s College Dropout for $2.99 just a few hours after it was listed and will be mailing that off today. I am raising some money slowly but I’m thinking pennies so that’s what I’m getting. When you start using the apps that pay you two cents for watching 20 minutes of videos, you know you’re on the wrong track. Most of us wouldn’t even take two seconds to bend over and pick up a penny but I still made $1 on Swagbucks yesterday without really trying. Upon further reflection, since most of the things I sell on eBay will likely only sell for a few dollars (if at all), it is a much better use of my time to see if the bookstores, music stores, and clothing stores want to buy my items, get rid of the rest, and get back to making art. I haven’t made any new art in over a week because I’ve been so focused on raising money a few dollars at a time. This is how poor people stay poor. My time would have been much better spent marching around Seattle’s artsiest areas with my creations asking galleries if I could put one of my pieces in the next Art Walk (way too late on that one but may still try). Yesterday’s efforts (including my one eBay sale) totaled $74 AND I relieved myself of three boxes of books I’ll never have to carry again.

All that said, since I have yet to sell any art (because I haven’t really showed it to any one), the best way for me to make money right now is to work. So I said yes to the random job offer that floated my way yesterday via email. While I resisted working Bumbershoot at first because I vowed to never help make the evil corporate music empire look good again, I said yes to the offer yesterday to be a PA for the team doing the video at Bumbershoot. Since I’m being paid by someone who is being paid by AEG, I’ve justified it morally but the truth is that I’d be in a way better situation financially if I wasn’t so romantic about how I make my money. It is important how we make our money and I have chosen to vote with my dollar AND my labor against corporations (steps off podium). That said, I’m sure I will have a fabulous time and learn a lot. I love that I get to learn from a professional video team again in the weeks before I head to Europe to make movies on my iPhone. The only other time I’ve worked for the video team at an event was when I was randomly offered to work the Tom Petty Show last summer a few days before taking @TheRingOfDOOM on a credit card funded video tour of the US (one of my duties that day was to stand next to someone in case they needed something while filming Tom Petty in the hallway/blessed). Still amazed by the people that pop into my life and when they choose to appear. Shoutout to a former boss lady for the recommendation.

Ultimately, it will be great to see the hundreds of people I expect to see again at Bumbershoot this weekend and the paycheck will take some pressure off. I always have fun working festivals and love to see how many miles I walk throughout the weekend. Sometimes I forget how good I am at this sort of work and how flattered I used to be when asked to work alongside my heroes. It still hurts sometimes when I see the show calendar of people I won’t be working with but then I remember that the best people will hire me directly if it was meant to be. Nothing felt better than being hired directly by Tyler, The Creator’s team at Sasquatch and those are the jobs I love to say yes to. All inner turmoil about morality aside, my favorite memory from the last time I worked Bumbershoot was when El-P did a double take when he saw my Quasimoto shirt (it’s the little things, still never met him even though we have mutual friends).

A few of the too many imperfect belt buckles I’ve made.

 The only goal I did NOT complete yesterday was working on setting up my Patreon, likely the one thing that will help me the most. I have been studying the art of Patreon and believe I have come up with some great rewards people may actually want. The video portion, as expected, is the part I’m slacking on the most. As of now my rewards are looking to be…

$1  - Access to photo feed of images not on Instagram

$5  - Access to vlog (I’ll be seeing too many beautiful things to not do it)

$10- Included in the polls about photos to be printed, destinations, zine themes etc

$25- Collaged Postcard mailed from wherever I am at that time

$50- 6 photo prints mailed

$250- Original handmade collage photo zine mailed

$500- Local snack pack of 12 items – one of a kind analog collage

$1000- photo book of city/theme of your choice

$5000- large framed collage shipped to you

The higher priced tiers would include all the items of the lower tiers. I love this idea of a collaged postcard so much and would really love to get something like this from a traveling artist. When I market it in the right way to the right people, it will work. Any feedback on this is welcomed! I thrive in situations where people are expecting things from me and would genuinely love to be a working artist traveling in Europe. And so it will be…

My daily blogs will be shorter and my goals will be limited for the next three days while I work the festival but they’ll probably include some great photos and interesting stories. Then on Monday, I'll get to mail off whatever has sold from this round of eBay sales. 

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Go to Sonic Boom, Buffalo Exchange to relieve myself of more stuff I don’t need.

7.      Email two favorite Seattle gallery owners about showing them my work for feedback and to Museum Crash with TheRingOfDOOM

8.     Find out if I can pro-rate my last month in my studio so I can pay less if possible.

9.     Tidy up studio so I can move around well again.

10.    Make some art dammit!

SONG OF THE DAY

Gerry Rafferty – “Right Down The Line” 1978  I’m having a revival with this song after doing the final edit on my Adult Contemporary playlist. I see the ideal scenario for playing this song is with the windows down in the desert (this may have actually happened). Haven’t listened to this song enough yet to notice what it’s about, I’m usually too busy swaying my head and holding my heart.

Day 29 of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 29

Cassettes I'm selling on eBay at their inflated sentimental rate of $99.99 for the first round because I love them so much. When I debated if I loved them more than I'd love to be in Europe, I listed them immediately.

Happy to say that the only goal I didn’t complete yesterday was to go for a walk. I’ve heard walks are supposed to be for exercise but I much prefer to walk as means of exploration and photography. Going for a walk starting from my studio is not fun anymore because I’ve spent too many years in this area… nothing is new here. At this time when I debate going on a walk, I always just get going on the next work block instead. I do have many more photos and videos to take before I leave Seattle in a few weeks, but I have work to before that happens.

I’ve had the misfortune/fortune to have my surviving credit card suffer from fraudulent use. This is only a good thing because it happened before I leave the country, I have to wait 7-10 days for a new card. It was to help me finish paying for this months bills so today I’ll be scraping together as much cash as I can find to make those payments by the 1st. Still remain confident that working hourly is a waste of time because it could never add up fast enough to be worth my effort. Since I sell mostly inexpensive things, my eBay endeavors tend to be extremely small change but the bonus side of that is that with every item I sell, I have one less thing to leave in my storage unit. Still likely a waste of time but I’d rather list stuff on eBay than serve whiskey to people who should stop drinking.

EBAY PROGRESS AT THIS TIME…

-       I finalized one sale already because someone made an offer for twice what I was asking for some rap cassettes; leaving the studio today to mail it off!

-       3 of my 61 items for sale on eBay currently have bids.

-       9 of my items have watchers

I've been taking hundreds of photos like this lately... feel free to pay me to take photos of your products. I'll make them look cooler, I promise.

As you can see, I have a long way to go but once I publish this, I’ll be heading out into the world to scrape together as much funds as possible to put directly into an ATM. I remain confident that these earthly money troubles are almost behind me but for now it’s time to liquidate my assets (this mostly means media). It is completely obvious to me and anyone paying attention, that my troubles are 100% of my own making but that was my choice to make. Still loving that I’ve allowed myself to go this far on my creative journey and I can’t wait to see how I make this happen.

One of the items I was intending to sell was my Roland SP555. The last dozen times I turned it on, it just shut itself off again but when I turned it on a couple days ago, it was working almost as well as when I first got it. I ended up spending a full 90 minute work block loving what I made on the music machine but I still don’t have the means to extract it from the buttons and onto a computer. The only music I’ve ever made was this collage of quotes from movies/songs that tells the story of my failed marriage. It’s totally a downer but I had to let that story out to move onto the next thing. Now that the 555 works again, I might love it enough to keep it locked up while I’m having adventures but that sounds more stupid every time I say/write it. So much easier to let it go when I thought I’d be able to make a few bucks from someone who knows how to fix them instead of giving up something that actually works.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Head to storage unit with boxes of stuff ready to store. Sell least favorite books/music at Half Price Books and see if anyone wants to buy any of the clothing I’ve had sitting around. Put money directly in the bank. Look for more items to sell on eBay.

7.     Collage cleanup

8.    Try to sell SmartTV on OfferUp or Craigslist

9.    Coinstar

10.   Spotify work block

11.    Lisbon writeup

12. 90 minute block of setting up Patreon for launch on the 1st.

SONG OF THE DAY

Joey Bada$$ - “Paper Trail$” 2015  You can earn more money but you can never get time back. I know that if I decide to keep my earthly possessions and set myself up for stability right now, I’ll regret it when I’m older. I’ve never been more ready to do something in my whole life (obviously I don’t count financials into this).

Day 28 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 28

I feel like I got a lot done yesterday even though it didn’t fall exactly in line with my goal list. I didn’t go for a walk, drink enough water, or stretch because I was too excited about finishing up my travel video for Lisbon. I ended up spending four 90 minute work blocks editing, uploading, and fine-tuning the video. I had no intention of making the footage into a travel video so it ended up looking like a fan video sandwiched in between the only footage of myself speaking to the camera. I did not grind away at my finished collages with the metal file or work on any new collages. I did list one item for sale on eBay but I’m gonna have to kick way more ass to make this happen.

Detail of my Giant’s Causeway collage, can’t wait to see it in person soon.

Three weeks left until I depart and I have so much to do. Most of it isn’t that fun but it’ll be worth it when I’m getting on that plane. Now that I’ve opened up my world on a global level, Seattle seems way too small for what I have in mind for myself. I feel so strongly about making this adventure happen, I’m willing to give up everything I have to see it through. I hope to have everything I own contained in one storage unit by the time I leave. This includes letting go of my car… the big one. The blue book value is the closest it’s ever been to not being an upside down car loan so the time is now. Even if I end up coming back to the US, I hope to live somewhere in a city where I don’t need a car… like New York, somewhere along the light rail in Seattle, or somewhere else I haven’t considered yet. If/when I decide to get another car, it will have tinted windows and most likely it will be a van so I can better use it to go on adventures.

I’ll be creating a Patreon account over the next week or so and I can’t wait to share all the rewards I’ve come up with. One of the rewards will be access to watching my vlog, a big step for me because I’m camera shy but facing my fears has worked out well every single time so far. Documenting my daily excuses has proven to be very eye opening and I would recommend the threat of public humiliation as a motivator to anyone (may not work if you’ve stopped giving too many fucks).

One of my favorite things I learned yesterday is that once I get to 400 followers on a Spotify playlist, I can apply to get paid to be a curator that filters through new music via Playlist Push. At 68 followers on my Hip Hop playlist, I still have a long way to go but since most of those appeared overnight, I have faith I can make that happen slowly but surely if I focus my efforts. I fell asleep halfway through my sixth work block yesterday while adding new songs to playlists. My favorite thing about making playlists is that it makes my life better so I’m scratching my own itch (something my heroes say will get me everywhere).

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     At least two blocks of listing items on ebay first before I work on fun stuff

7.     Collage cleanup

8.     Lisbon post...

SONG OF THE DAY

Alex Da Kid, H.E.R., Rapsody – “Go” 2018  This is one of my most overplayed tracks so far from my upcoming September playlist still under construction. 

Day 27 Of Delusional Optimist’s Guide To Achieving The I’mPossible

Day 27

Waking up knowing it’s time to prep to leave the country feels good. I know there is a lot of work to do but I love that stuff. Every time I go through the many items in my storage unit, I look at it through new eyes. Like most of us, I have tons of stuff just sitting in boxes in storage because I like them just enough to keep them. For me this is mostly media; aside from kitchen stuff, the bulk of my belongings are boxes of CDs, DVDs, books, and magazines. Previously, I made a rule for myself that I must either use it or get rid of it. This is how I ended up starting to collage so it has been working out well. I do love my book collection but I’ve already read all those books. They make me smile when I look at them but when everything goes as planned, I will not have a bookshelf in the US to put my books on. When you move as often as I have, it really makes you question why you’re keeping all this stuff. I still need a few more days to consider letting go of my CDs even though those have been boxed up since before I moved most of my belongings to a storage unit. The books and CDs remain in my storage unit for now but I have started to put cassettes and DVDs up for sale. I’ll be bringing them somewhere local to try and sell them if eBay doesn’t work. If you're interested in seeing what I have for sale, HERE's the link to my shop.

I'm selling a 5x7 canvas print of @TheRingOfDOOM's first photo on eBay. I've posted over 700 photos since this was taken. 

Speaking of moving, I’m the type of person that only owns items that fit inside my Subaru that I can carry myself. I did this on purpose so I could move from place to place without the assistance of others. This is a metaphor for my whole life which is why my plans for the next few weeks are so scary. I’m hoping to sell some of my large pieces of art to help fund my Europe trip but I also have plans to start a Patreon. I’ve been researching what works and what doesn’t and I think I have some ideas on how to make it work for me. It’ll be an interesting process throughout which I will learn a lot about myself, but I will get that going in a few more days.

It’s looking like I’ll be moving out of my studio in the days before I leave for Europe so I don’t have to pay for it while I’m gone. If I do that AND release my car, I’ll be in a much better position to not only pay for my trip to Europe but to potentially stay for longer. The more things I let go, the freer I feel.

R&B cassingle six pack for sale on eBay.

Yesterday, I completed 7 ninety minute work blocks. I did not go for a walk because I felt inclined to just keep going. Three of the blocks were spent listing items for sale on eBay, two on website/Instagram, half a work block on sanding resin collages, and the rest on Spotify. I quickly learned that grinding epoxy resin down isn’t something I’m yet able to do for 90 minutes in a row. Right now it’s basically sawing at resin with a metal file for long periods of time. Here’s hoping that by the time I get buff enough to do that for 90 minutes straight, that I’ll have already finished cleaning up all my collages. The tape method I learned from Reddit will save me too many hours to count. I’d like to polish up my big collages before I bring them somewhere for evaluation so I won’t be heading into town until that is completed.

Since I turned off the Instagram notifications and deleted the Facebook app from my phone a few weeks back, I’ve been better at using my time wisely. Now that I have items for sale on eBay, it’s hard to stop myself from looking at what is selling. Out of the 40 items I have listed, two have bids so far. If they don’t cancel their bids, I will have made $6 so I’m totally crushing it.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     At least two work blocks of listing items for sale on Ebay

7.     Collage clean up session x 2

8.     Block of Lisbon travel write-up

9.     New collage work block on ugly striped canvas

SONG OF THE DAY

Everything Is Recorded, Sampha, Ibeyi, Wiki, Kamasi Washington – “Mountains Of Gold” 2017  This combo of artists amazes me.

Day 26 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 26

I couldn’t be more excited about my renewed decision to make this trip to Europe happen. One of the things that changed my mind was the realization that the credit cards I wanted to take to Europe were maxxed out anyway so it shouldn’t have affected my decision in the first place. The credit union card I still have will work just fine once I pay it off with funds I’ve earned selling my art and surplus stuff. One of the jobs I didn’t get would have me working for the dark side of the music industry again so not getting that job is a blessing in disguise. The job I did work for a day and a half was at a weed store. Part of me was excited to have my foot in the door when vape lounge/music venues eventually come to fruition but mostly I realized that I do not want to be high enough to be good at that job or stay in Seattle at this time. While I do enjoy weed, I’m not enough of a smoker to be helpful to people searching out expertise. I did love the idea of serving marijuana instead of drinks because weed can cure cancer and alcohol causes whole lives to be ruined but I still don’t think its for me. The bottom line is that I did not like waking up knowing that I was part of the fixed system of minimum wage jobs even if it would eventually get me where I want to go. In the end, I just can’t see myself doing anything but getting on that plane in 23 days.

Clay utensils and cups/bowls for TheRingOfDOOM and Eddie, his eight headed roommate. 

 On Monday, I plan on actually getting out into the world in person to speak with people who can help me sell my art and guide me in the right direction. I’m very much looking forward to getting feedback on my creations (good or bad) and can’t wait to see the look on people’s faces when they look into the water.

Thanks to yesterday’s visit to my storage unit, my studio is now filled with stuff I’m ready to exit my life. A lot of it is sentimental but owning it will not help me get to Europe. Yes I love my DVD collection but if it has been in a box in a storage unit for a year and a half, do I really need it? Will I even miss my copy of Romancing The Stone when I’m photographing castles in France? I really don’t think so. Those of you that know me well, know that I’ve been talking about getting rid of my car for years. Owning the car helped me to get a ton of great jobs that led to the best opportunities of my life so far but they never paid me enough to actually own the car. I even went so far as to live in it so that I could afford to keep it. Knowing that some of the most famous people in the world have been in my car does not help me make the payments. Even if it ends up costing me money to get rid of the car, it’ll be worth it. Of course I love it but the places I want to go these days are not reachable by car. My current plans for that are to research the pay off amount and then email the Subaru dealership and tell them my story to see if they want the car. If only some of the people who had been in the car could be used as selling points, it would be gone in an instant. An example of who has been in my car… Ariana Grande, Mac Miller, Logic, at least half of the Rhymesayers roster, Tour Managers of your favorite rappers, etc. This close proximity to fame is part of the reason I am unable to settle for a normal life. Would you want to get a 9-5 if the last jobs you had were touring the country spreading love and driving around the team of one of the most famous rappers in the world at a music festival? I’m more than willing to give up my Earthly possessions to grant myself the opportunity to follow my internal compass to Bristol and beyond. 

Owning Heathers on DVD won’t help me get anywhere in life. 

Once I start setting up my life to depart the country, there will be no other option than to go. I do not want the things that most people want and I am in a position to do things and go places other people can’t because I lack roots at this time. My pursuit of enough money to stay in Seattle has distanced me from the community so it feels like I have no reason to stay even if that’s not true. At this time, I’m feeling the irresistible pull of the world and freeing myself of stuff to make it happen feels awesome… even though I have literally sold nothing yet, not even art. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be facing my biggest fears to set myself up for success and I know it will be a much better story than if I had gone to work at a weed store five days a week.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     At least three work blocks of listing items for sale on Ebay

7.     Collage clean up session

SONG OF THE DAY

Ibeyi - “Transmission/Michaelion” 2018   It takes me awhile to know what songs are about because I’m too busy loving the sound of it. Only later once I know all the words and find myself singing them aloud do I finally realize what it’s about. This song is just so damn beautiful, I had to share.

Day 25 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 25

First of set of six purple wave glass coasters pre-resin.

The best decisions I’ve ever made in my life were made around 4am with my eyes wide open. Last night was to be the night before my first real Monday of my recently acquired 9-5 but instead it turned out to be the night I decided to quit being scared and dive all the way into life headfirst. The only thing I’ve ever been sure about was that I wanted my life to be a good story so I quit the 9-5 and constructed the plan to make this trip happen at the crack of dawn. This two month adventure in Europe will be the best story I’ve ever told and the photos I will make will be some of the most beautiful my timeline has ever seen. I’ve heard that giving up on your big dreams happens more than a few times along the journey to success so I’m right on track. The six work blocks I completed yesterday were mostly spent on Spotify, my website, and collages.

Now that I have only 23 days until I leave for Europe, it is time to get down to business and start liquidating all the stuff that’s been sitting in my storage unit for a year and a half. Today I’ll be venturing to sift through my unnecessary belongings and put them up for sale. I have barely worn shoes in there I haven’t worn in over five years and endless other items that can help me to make this trip happen if I get them on eBay and someone actually wants to buy them.

VHS for a bundle deal on eBay.

 So on this day that would have been my Monday, I plan on focusing at least two (if not four) work blocks to listing stuff on eBay for a big sale that’ll end next Sunday. I won’t be writing about the big steps I take beyond eBay until after I do them so I can be sure I’m being about it and not just talking about it anymore. There are infinite ways to make money and I’ve hardly tried any of them. This is when things will start to get interesting, I leave in just over three weeks for two months in Europe and I can’t wait to show you how I make it happen. Stand by while I actually attempt the I’mPossible…

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     2-4 blocks of ebay

7.     Collage Cleanup Session

8.     Travel Section Website

SONG OF THE DAY

Heart – “Straight On” 1978  I’ve had more than a few moments with this song over the years but now it is time to make it my anthem. It took me just over 40 years to figure out what I wanted to do with my life and I the only option I have at this time is to run directly towards my biggest dreams. The fact that the song was released the year I was born is a lucky coincidence.

Day 24 Of Delusional Optimist’s Guide To Achieving The I’mPossible

Day 24

 @TheRingOfDOOM with his new ramen bowl, spoon, knife, and chopsticks.

Yesterday I beat my former record of eight 90 minute work blocks in a day and completed nine; that is thirteen and a half hours working toward my big goals. I did not go for a walk so that meant I was able to maintain focus on tasks and spend zero dollars. I did not do any analog collage but I did finish three Photoshop work blocks in which I completed a bunch of new Spotify playlist images. My latest addiction is seeing my own art all up in the Spotify; I’d love to make album art someday soon. Finally posted another playlist on my website this morning. I started the Make Something playlist back in 2015 and have listened to it while creating ever since; it has the most followers out of all my playlists (12 whole followers!). My bag is packed and ready to go on a photo expedition to get more footage for the next TheRingOfDOOM video as soon as I gather the energy.

One of the other things I completed yesterday was the photoshopped promo image for the writeup of my Porto adventure. It would have been slick to write about my European adventures as they were happening but I wasn’t ready yet. I have way too many great photos and weird stories yet to share and I’m looking forward to seeing how my travelogues evolve. Still mulling over my decision not to apply to work with Rick Steves, the job was selling tour packages over the phone but it still would have been great to learn from that Jedi Master. Can anyone name ANY travel show guides that are women? We may need someone to step up (raises hand).

The collage on the left was made before I learned the pro tip used on the collage on the right. The left collage needs to be cleaned up with a metal file and sandpaper and the one on the right only needs the tape peeled off to be "perfect." So glad to learn this new skill.

 Even though the smoke over Seattle has cleared, I’m still feeling the urge to be a hermit. This is nothing new but now that I work five days a week and have some daylight left when I complete work, it’s easier to justify staying in and being productive. I can always take pictures tomorrow after work. While I am 100% confident all the best things will happen to me outside of this tiny box; when I’m inside it I’m usually working towards my goals and not spending any money. I WILL MAKE AN ANALOG COLLAGE TODAY or at least start one. Every new image I make blows my own mind so I must keep it up. One of the best things about working on my Spotify lists is that I have new music to listen to while making stuff so today is gonna be a good day.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.      Analog collage block

7.      Spotify work block

8.      Instagram work block to prep for work days

9.      Free Photo Book work block

SONG OF THE DAY

Sevdaliza – “Hubris” 2017  Since I heard “Human” last year, I’ve had a steady flow of new favorite Sevdaliza songs and today it is “Hubris.” Wishing there was a video for this gem but “Human” is worth your time as well.

Day 23 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 23

I have yet to work a full week at my new 9-5 but today is my first “Saturday” in years. While there is a lot to learn, my new job is very low stress and the kind of job you can release after clocking out for the day; an ideal situation for someone working toward a larger goal. It does feel good to speak with humans on a regular basis again but I can't help but wonder if I’ve given up or have gifted myself a more reasonable timeline. The last two days I worked 12 hours and sadly only completed four 90 minute work blocks; factoring in eight hours of sleep each night and transit time, I wasted at least 12 hours doing nothing. It is embarrassing to not complete my goals and write about it but I still just watched movies when I got back to my spot after work last night. Maybe I needed to relax but when I have so far to go to become a financially stable adult, relaxing feels irresponsible.

Shortly before the purple piece at the top was accidentally resined to the table. 

For the last five years since I quit Whole Foods, I have never been sure if I’d be able to pay my bills every month. As of two days ago, I now know I’ll be able to make those payments if I just keep going to work every day and remain frugal. That said, at this rate I won’t be able to afford dental work for at least a year (way too long when fillings came out months ago) and I still wouldn’t be able to pay for a real place to live (Bezosian Rent Warfare). Starting this new job clouded over my plans for the next few months and I must fine tune my trajectory if I hope to accomplish anything. In the past, I would have gone on a spacecruise to the ocean to mull over my next moves but I’d have to spend money I don’t have to make it happen. Thus lies the curse of the upside down car loan; can’t afford to get rid of the car and can’t afford to drive it.

Since I’m not working today, I hope to accomplish the goals I did not complete the last few days and to make some new art. I must strive to remember every day how good it feels to cross an item off my To Do list, even if it’s something so ridiculous as film scenes of your cardboard box movie at the foot of Bezos’ Balls (check!). Trying to decide if I should get up early to write my blog before work or will myself to do it every day when I get back…

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     10 Minute Stretch

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Collage work block

7.      Spotify work block

8.     Finalize list of outdoor shots for TROD video and gather/create props

SONG OF THE DAY

U2 – “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” 1987  I would never call myself a U2 fan but some of their older music still pulls me in. In addition to creating a beautiful song, filming this video on the streets of Vegas made thousands of people smile. I hope to be able to make the kind of art that can affect people the way this song/video affects me and I’ll never get there if I don’t create art on a daily basis. Knowing that the world needs creators more than they need cogs in a fixed machine keeps me on my path when I feel like giving up.

Day 22 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 22

Even though I only worked a half day, yesterday was my intro to the empty feeling one has after working 9-5. Needless to say, my original goals were pushed aside. I had previously forgotten I had added yoga to my to do list but I still have only just stretched. I didn’t drink enough water, or work on T-ROD movie, or work on a Spotify list, or post twice on Instagram. Lame. My first work block of the day is gonna be a little wonky for a bit. My goal will be to post my daily blog before I go to work so that when I get back to the studio, all I’ll have to do is work on my craft.

Today is already my Friday so after work today, I’ll be experiencing my first “weekend” in years that I’ll work all the way through. At this time, I’m realizing that I need to fine tune what my new plan is. Still gonna dream of a cash windfall (and take steps toward) so I can photograph the art Indian Giver is blessing Paris with as we speak and utilize the French I’ve been learning on the Duolingo app but in the meantime, I’m going to keep slowly building my foundation. Knowing that all my bills will be paid with one job (if I remain in this “living” situation) feels mostly good but I can almost visualize the photos I’d get to take in London/Paris/Copenhagen/Rotterdam and my heart hurts for everyone who would’ve seen them. Technically, I still have two years to accomplish my five year goal of getting paid to go to Europe.

Looking forward to developing a routine but it may not be time for that just yet. My favorite thing I DID do yesterday was to sign up to potentially make money with Medium and post a few of my best pieces on Reddit. It was super easy to make the change so we’ll see what happens with that.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     30 Minute Yoga YouTube Video

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.    Finalize plan of footage to capture in Seattle, gather props, pack bag

7.    90 Minute Collage Block

SONG OF THE DAY

Ama Lou “Wire” 2018  The video Ama Lou released for this song is a three pack with "Wire" as the last song. 

Day 21 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 21

Yesterday while cleaning the Cheeto rain out of @TheRingOfDOOM’s cardboard box apartment, I learned about another cheese poof metaphor. Even when the Cheetos have been cleaned up, they’ve left a permanent grease stain on the box itself, I’ll go ahead and directly relate that to the grease stain Trump/Bezos is leaving on our country and then move on to something else.

Resin El Wire Creation

I poured the resin on the three small pieces I’m currently almost finished with and also poured the first layer of my weird resin, el wire, creations. Recently, I made my first free-standing (battery pack attached) @TheRingOfDOOM lights because I felt so inclined. Once I get some batteries, I’ll be able to leave them places at night for lit up photo ops and it will make me smile. I didn’t start any new collages because I spent two full work blocks making tiny bowls, cups, chopsticks, spoon, knife, and big serving bowls out of polymer clay and baking them in my toaster oven.

Once I finished with the polymer clay, I realized that I have moved into a phase in which I must be an early bird again and that a sixth work block would have me staying up too late. Today is different than the rest will be but without going into detail just yet, I will say that I do now have a 9-5. It’s not Monday-Friday but I’m excited to only work eight hours in a day and to see what it’s like to be done working at 5pm. Since I will be working today, I’ll have to reevaluate the number of goals I set for myself because most of the day will be spent making money. Excited to be able to breathe again (due to having a steady flow of money coming in but also the smoke from the fires has Seattle wheezing).

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     30 Minute Yoga YouTube Video

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.      Spotify work block/ Collage

7..     Finalize list of outdoor shots for TROD video and gather props

SONG OF THE DAY

ABRA – “DIAMONDS AND GOLD” 2014  Every few months I have a new favorite Abra song, happy to have arrived at “DIAMONDS AND GOLD.”

DID YOU KNOW

Did you know that the first music video list I published was a collection of Music Videos With Famous Actors and Actresses back in January 2013? The boring name turns out to make it much easier to find my posts on Google for the win. This is one of the best music videos ever made.

Day 20 Of Delusional Optimist’s Guide To Achieving The I’mPossible

Day 20

The only goal I did not reach yesterday was to put any items for sale on ebay. My weak excuse is that most of the items I have at this time have failed to sell on ebay multiple times and that my attempts to flip stuff online ended up as a plastic tub of shit no one wants… like an R. Kelly cassette, or an Alaska commemorative spoon, or an eight headed mink stole. It should come to no surprise to me that I choose things (music, thrift store items) that do not make a profit but are awesome (Underground Hip Hop). Example, not a fan of Bieber or Grande but I love Taylar Elizza Beth and 10.4 Rog. Instead of eBaying, I spent time at the Laundromat and under Bezos’ Balls with @TheRingOfDOOM’s cardboard box apartment.

The sunset collage I almost didn't finish because I don't love the colors turned into one of my favorite pieces. I plan on turning it into a Spotifly playlist image so I can see it often.

As I reach the end of all my big collage projects without any more large frames in my possession, I’m reminded that I still have around 50 small and imperfect thrifted frames leftover from #100DaysOfTheRingOfDOOMcollages. I much prefer making large pieces but as I say to myself all the time, I must use what I have. There’s lots of things I prefer to do, like eating at delicious restaurants and spacecruising to the ocean whenever, but if we always did what we prefer to do, we’d just be laying on the couch watching Netflix in a diabetic coma from too much ice cream and chocolate. I still would prefer to take photos of Street Art (and everything) in Paris than building a solid foundation out of hourly wages but if I don’t take actions towards large sums of money, they will not arrive.

Over the next few months, I hope to become as addicted to finishing stuff as I am to coffee. Sometimes when I find myself leisurely gluing tiny pieces of water, I think about the sense of urgency that kicks in when I’m working for others and I start gluing faster. I currently have 201 drafted blog posts on my old blogger site, a fully drafted Hip Hop Crossword/Activity Book, way too many hours of @TheRingOfDOOM footage, 80 belt buckle blanks, 50+ tiny frames, 20 blank reusable bags, 800 button blanks, 147 uncompleted To Do lists, thousands of photos to sort into books/zines, and more than one storyboarded iphone movie (among other projects). When I finish all this stuff, I get to see what I’ll do next but the procrastinator in me wonders if all these projects should be finished. For someone who got many A’s on papers written the night before they were due, it is way too easy to put things off when there is no deadline. The time frame created by my plane ticket to Europe (I still have it) on September 17 may have been permanently replaced with an 18 month timeline (at least) so the sense of urgency/panic has turned into a marathon instead of a sprint. I keep thinking about where I should be as a forty year old but then I remember that I must not give a fuck about shoulds; I must fine tune my goals so I can work my way through them.

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     30 Minute Yoga YouTube Video

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Pour resin on current projects.

7.     Make at least one small framed collage and start next coaster set.

8.    Clean Cheeto rain out of cardboard box movie set and gather props needed for rest of the             scenes.

9.    Make tiny bowl of ramen out of polymer clay, resin, and actual ramen.

10.   Spotify work block

11.    90 Minute block sorting photos by city/artist for books/zines

SONG OF THE DAY

Seinabo Sey – “Younger” 2014 Until Death Becomes Her turns into our reality, none of us are getting any younger so we may as well just DOOM it.

DID YOU KNOW

Did you know I have a YouTube playlist with almost 100 animated videos on it? I’ve had Animated Videos Part VII drafted since mid 2017 so it’s no longer fresh but like I’ve said before, one of the best things about music is that the first time you hear it, it is new to you. I will be finalizing a new post of more current animated videos soon. Here’s one of my favorites from the playlist that is best consumed on SmartTV or whatever device you have close to you.

Day 19 Of Delusional Optimist's Guide To Achieving The I'mPossible

Day 19

Yesterday’s long walk rejuvenated my excitement for my camera roll and also made me feel extra 40 (ouch). It’s been weeks since I went on one of my ridiculously long walks so I tried to keep it mellow but still ended up walking 6.5 miles. When traveling overseas or exploring a new city, I typically walk an average of 9 miles a day but confining myself to my art cubicle has made me out of shape. When I was at the bottom of Capitol Hill looking up, I suddenly remembered how hungry I was and felt the irresistible draw of the food I’d already purchased in my mini fridge. The photos I got amaze me and I have more than a few places in Seattle I plan on photographing in the very near future.

Almost completed 3D Aquarium collage. iPhone doesn’t know which layer to focus on. 

I may have finished my large 3D water collage. I’d love to keep adding layers forever but it is getting heavier and more expensive to create with every pour. Very excited to flex my newly acquired knowledge about how to keep the edges pretty but I have a ton of work to do to fine tune the pieces I’ve already completed. Grinding down epoxy resin with a metal file turns out to be one of those things best done outside so I’ll likely be sanding edges at a park near you soon.

There were five work blocks completed yesterday because I don’t count walking and taking photos due to loving it too much. I spent at least an hour rolling around on my foam cylinder willing my back to realign itself which likely will help me more than anything else I did yesterday. I was blessed to remember that I have an envelope of photos of flamingos so I’m a little more excited about my sunset collage. For the most part, I’m not into the dusty pastels of sunset photos but when flamingos are added, my genetically caused bobblehead of approval sets in. Since Sundays mean nothing to me, I have every intention of kicking more ass today than for the last five days.

Still under construction sunset collage...

TODAY’S GOALS

1.     Drink 64 oz. water

2.     Stretch at least 10 minutes

3.     Go For A Walk

4.     Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks

5.     2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool

6.     Add another layer to small resin projects and work on sunset piece

7.     Use my new Target Gift Card to purchase last of supplies for filming storyboarded video.

8.     Put at least five items for sale on ebay.

9.     Spotify work block

SONG OF THE DAY

Quantic – “Time Is The Enemy” 2001  I discovered this song way too late but it has recently made it’s way into my currently overplaying rotation.

DID YOU KNOW

Did you know I made a @TheRingOfDOOM coaster set? The infinite possibilities of epoxy resin has me looking at everything in a new way. I have a few more coaster sets ready for art but I’ll always love my first (this does not apply to every situation) the most.

First @TheRingOfDOOM Coaster Set