Day 23
I have yet to work a full week at my new 9-5 but today is my first “Saturday” in years. While there is a lot to learn, my new job is very low stress and the kind of job you can release after clocking out for the day; an ideal situation for someone working toward a larger goal. It does feel good to speak with humans on a regular basis again but I can't help but wonder if I’ve given up or have gifted myself a more reasonable timeline. The last two days I worked 12 hours and sadly only completed four 90 minute work blocks; factoring in eight hours of sleep each night and transit time, I wasted at least 12 hours doing nothing. It is embarrassing to not complete my goals and write about it but I still just watched movies when I got back to my spot after work last night. Maybe I needed to relax but when I have so far to go to become a financially stable adult, relaxing feels irresponsible.
Shortly before the purple piece at the top was accidentally resined to the table.
For the last five years since I quit Whole Foods, I have never been sure if I’d be able to pay my bills every month. As of two days ago, I now know I’ll be able to make those payments if I just keep going to work every day and remain frugal. That said, at this rate I won’t be able to afford dental work for at least a year (way too long when fillings came out months ago) and I still wouldn’t be able to pay for a real place to live (Bezosian Rent Warfare). Starting this new job clouded over my plans for the next few months and I must fine tune my trajectory if I hope to accomplish anything. In the past, I would have gone on a spacecruise to the ocean to mull over my next moves but I’d have to spend money I don’t have to make it happen. Thus lies the curse of the upside down car loan; can’t afford to get rid of the car and can’t afford to drive it.
Since I’m not working today, I hope to accomplish the goals I did not complete the last few days and to make some new art. I must strive to remember every day how good it feels to cross an item off my To Do list, even if it’s something so ridiculous as film scenes of your cardboard box movie at the foot of Bezos’ Balls (check!). Trying to decide if I should get up early to write my blog before work or will myself to do it every day when I get back…
TODAY’S GOALS
1. Drink 64 oz. water
2. 10 Minute Stretch
3. Go For A Walk
4. Two Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – 2-3 blocks
5. 2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool
6. Collage work block
7. Spotify work block
8. Finalize list of outdoor shots for TROD video and gather/create props
SONG OF THE DAY
U2 – “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” 1987 I would never call myself a U2 fan but some of their older music still pulls me in. In addition to creating a beautiful song, filming this video on the streets of Vegas made thousands of people smile. I hope to be able to make the kind of art that can affect people the way this song/video affects me and I’ll never get there if I don’t create art on a daily basis. Knowing that the world needs creators more than they need cogs in a fixed machine keeps me on my path when I feel like giving up.