Day 42
After typing Day 42 just now, I’m reminded about The Meaning Of Life as written by Douglas Adams that I must either put in a box, sell, or bring with me to Europe. On this 42nd day of writing about pulling the courage to live my best life out of the large steaming pile of bullshit I’ve been peeking from under, I must finally open all the doors around me and experience life on the other side. I must make the damn videos to sell my car and truly launch my Patreon today. As with most, I’m worried that I won’t make a good video so I’m procrastinating. No one starts out as Michel Gondry, even Michel Gondry didn’t start out being good at what he does. If we’re not afraid to grow and learn new skills, we will be stuck doing the same thing forever. It’s easy to find excuses not to do but that only serves to prevent us from living.
I did not take a load of anything to my storage unit because I wanted one more day to take deep breaths before I begin this adventure. That is the truth. I am terrible at relaxing because for as long as I can remember I’ve had such a long way to go to reach financial security that it seems irresponsible to relax. Throughout my music career people would ask me why I wasn’t content where I was. If I was content to pay my bills with a credit card indefinitely so that I could work in the music industry, I’d be a fool. Yes, change is difficult and yes, there will be those who make fun of me for being a 40 year old woman who wears rap shirts and travels with a fictional character but I’m not doing this for them. I’m doing this for me and the brand new @TheRingOfDOOM figure I made last night.
Those who are paying attention may have noticed that in addition to documenting the steps I’m taking towards my biggest dreams, this blog is evidence of the great battle going on inside my head and how on a daily basis, I must convince myself to keep going. I’m getting a mental picture of myself up to my neck in my own bullshit, attempting to pull myself out using the vines surrounding me that are actually the power cords of all my devices. I have the entire universe to gain if I wrangle this technology and turn these power cord vines into the Intergalactic Art Bridge I know it can be (cue animation team I hope to be in a position to hire someday). Of course it would be easier to allow myself to stay in this Amazonian jungle of media and scroll through others lives forever but I haven’t been able to find what I want to watch. I want to watch a show where a tiny alien travels the world and talks to artists and helps transmit their messages to the universe. It will be hilarious and inspiring while also showing people beautiful places and alternate ways to live their lives; it will be the best show I have ever seen.
I always wanted my life to be a good story and it already is but I have been letting others write my script for me. Waiting for someone to hand you an opportunity, like an offer to work 40 hours a week to not make enough money to live alone or go to the dentist, will keep us exactly where we are. If we work as hard for ourselves as we do for others, the possibilities are truly endless but I must stop writing about what I’m going to do and JUST DOOM IT. So today on this 42nd day of writing about wading through my own bullshit, I recognize that the meaning of my life is to stop allowing other people to let me feel small and to see that I’ve already built the bridge I must find the courage to cross. It’s easy, I just need to use my brain and my phone to its maximum potential; today.
TODAY’S GOALS
1. Drink 64 oz. water
2. 10 Minute Stretch
3. Go For A Walk
4. Blog Posts On Website… Shared (post on all blogs on Medium also) – LISBON!!
5. 2-3 Instagram Posts Per Account @206liz @TheRingOfDOOM @MyDefOfCool
6. Mail off the recently sold eBay items
7. Take load to storage unit and film footage for car sale video
8. Stop at Everyday Music to sell CDs
9. Just keep swimming
SONG OF THE DAY
Mac Miller x Prodigy x Alchemist Freestyle On Toca Tuesdays 2013 In the spirit of letting artists know how much we appreciate them while they’re still here, I want Alchemist to know that I think he is one of the greatest musicians of our time and I want to give him a big hug because he probably needs it right now. We do have mutual friends and acquaintances but I probably won’t get to hug him anytime soon. If you’re reading this and you have a chance to hug Alchemist, will you please hug him one more time for me? If you could pick him up and swing him around in a circle too, that would be perfect.